Day 3 of holiday...

That's the end of day 3 and my reports were still left untouched. Woke up today to realise that my body was aching all over the places. Guess that it can be attributed to not warming up before the start of the badminton session.

Most of the time today was spent at home, resting, as I don't feel like moving much due to the aches (well, I got to admit that I'm getting older). The Christmas dinner is coming soon and I've still have not shop for my clothes. Guess that I will have to go to Bugis this Saturday and hope that I can find the shirt I want.

Talking about Christmas... This remind me that the year is coming to a close soon. Looking back at what I've done this year so far, I can't really think of any accomplishment that I had. This makes me wonder... Did I waste this year? I guess that it's pretty hard to determine. In terms of academic , So far, I think that I did pretty well. But I know that I've not put in 100% of my effort in it and hope that I can push myself a little harder.

In summary, this is how I spent most of my time:

Day 2 of holiday...

Today was a rather interesting day. Went for badminton session with my secondary school friends at the community centre. It's been awhile since we met up and play badminton. The last time we met was during the new year period... and now... it's also the end of 2008.

After the badminton session, we went to have our dinner at a food court at HDB hub. The beadcurd is quite nice... Smooth and sweet. After that, we went to the arcade to play some drum and driving. It's been awhile since we hang out together too. We chatted at the nearby sky garden for quite sometime and I guess that it rather enjoyable. Different from my normal days. This sort of drag me back to the secondary school days where we will hangout and chill. Looking back, they didn't change much compared to me. I sometimes wonder if this kind of changes is good or bad. I guess it's up for debate.

Changes come but hardly goes... even if it does... it will still leave a mark... that signify an end to a part of your life that you may once truly hold dear. Sometimes, I hope that people will not talk about the past.. especially the not so good one... but I guess that not up to me to decide...

Day 1 of holiday...

Just another normal day... was resting most of the time to rejuvenate myself after the revision I've done from night to morning. Haven started on my reports and I know that it will take awhile for me to even touch it. Just see if I can motivate myself to start the ball rolling...

Went to the library today to return and borrow some books. One of the book I borrowed is:

It's a rather interesting book that is written in a way that's more like a case review with quite a few references and definitions. The author, Stan Gooch, also included personal experiences that he had and talk about the origin of each phenomena, ranging from Incubi and Succubi to multiple personality which was once thought as a form of possession. Using his knowledge as a psychology researcher, he try to introduce it into each phenomena. Haha, enough of the book review...

After going to the library, I went to Popular to buy a Diary for the new year! Just how that the money will not go to waste :P Here's how the diary look like:

Nice right? Hehe~ Nice design and I like the side a lot because they cover it in gold! And that's quite a lot of information inside which is quite useful such as GMT and conversion table. I also changed the Url and template of the blog to a simpler one. Maybe I will update the information in the following days for profile and stuff... Tomorrow, badminton session is on!

Haiz...

My mind is in a mess now... Guess that it has never been "tidy"... 10 years down the road, I wonder if I will regret the choices I've made. Although the past cannot be changed, the present and the future is for us to mold... I asked myself... Is this the life you want to lead? But it seems so hard for me to change for the better even when there's nothing in my way now... Or am I even on my path?

Life, itself is a very interesting stuff... It's like a seedling growing into a tree... Had to went through all the storms and winds to become what they have become... With age, one's wisdom grows, like how the bark of the tree thicken. But is it always true? Life itself has evolved with time since the very start of it... From the simple beginning to the complication now... I wonder if there's anything that doesn't change...

People said that with time, memories will fade away... If I can make a choice... I would choose to keep those happy times I had and not the bad one. Hoping that I can still smiles at those good times as I stroll down memory lane... everynow and then...

There are a lot of thoughts swirling in my mind but I just can't seem to express them in words... My heart is pounding but I don't feel ''alive''... I going to lose it if I still can't find it... Are you actually getting closer or further away from me? I guess only you have the answer...

Purpose...

Days went by... and I feel that I'm like a robot, programmed to perform the same task every week... I believe that in one point of anyone's life, they will think about their purpose in life... Whether is it a short-term purpose or a long-term one... Years have passed and I have not found mine... I'm beginning to think that I will never find my purpose in life...

In a blink of the eyes, this year is coming to an end... And I would ask myself... Have I done anything meaningful this year? More often than not, I can't think of anything which I deem meaningful. People had asked me... what you want to be in the future? Even though it seems like an easy question, I don't have the answer to it... All I want is to lead a peaceful and normal life... away from the the buzzling city and it seems pretty hard to fulfil this wish of mine.

All I can do now is go with the flow...

Mood swings...

That's what I'm having this few days... Feel so tired... Sometimes I wonder if the choices I made is the right one.. Although the past cannot be changed, but the regrets linger around... School is just like any other day, plain and tiring.

Sometimes, I myself wonder why I let my hair grow... the past is just like my hair... with each brand new day, my hair gets longer and a part of the past fade away with each drop of the hair... but never will it vanish completely...

Been looking for my motivation and my purpose but I just can't seems to find it.. No longer am I the same as I was before... and never will I be the same again... Some events that happen in life will alter the path you take... but only you, yourself can make a change for better or for worst...

Once you get caught in the cycle, it's hard to get out of it... it's may seems like all the efforts and struggles you make is useless... but never give up, for He who presevere will enjoy the fruit of success... Been closing myself to others for some reasons... just don't feel like talking. Still have reports and stuff to do... but doesn't have the mood for work... maybe I'll do it in the morning...

That's for now... time to bathe... And maybe sleep.

Those days...

Time truly flies... And like what my friend said, you are one year closer to death. Interesting way to put it, but it makes me think of what I've wanted to accomplish and generally, what have I done in my life. Have been tired for these few days, maybe due to the lack of sleep.

Anyway, went home after school, drenched, and got myself a nap before meeting my friends (jie mei) for dinner. Went to pizza hut and tried the tom yum flavour or something and it's not really tasty compared to the others. Went to slack around after that and headed home.

One year older... but am I going to be wiser? A few minutes left before the day is over... wanted to thank all those people for reminding me that I'm not ''invisible''. Even such simple words can have such an impact on people. Now I know why the pen is mightier than a sword... I'm don't fancy presents and stuff; ask me what I want and my answer will be nothing.

I've lost my touch with nature and it's been a long time since I'm in tune with mother earth. Maybe it's time to embrace this once again... As a person who doesn't celebrate his birthday, I prefer a more ''low-profile'' thingy than telling around a month before my birthday that my birthday is coming.

To me, gift is just a token and sincerity, but what's more important is the company of friends, '' through good times and bad times, I'll be on your side forever more..." That's more important than any gifts. Friends that know me since botak to now.

People always see a link between religious and spiritual. Can't a person be spirtual and not religious? To me, they are two different entities. I consider myself spiritual but not religious; not bonded to any rules or regulations of any religion. But I know that one of these days, it will come knocking on my door... For now, let's go with the flow...